Skyfall (2012) Movie review – Idiots in the cinema ruined my viewing

*Spoiler alert*

OK,I have not been to the cinema for over a year,I have not been to a packed cinema for a very long time,(I think the last was Fight club)

So as I walked into the cinema I was horrified to find all these people jammed into the first 20 rows,I finally arrived at the 2nd row from the front and found a row of free seats,bonds been out for weeks so I was guessing the interest would have died off,I guessed wrong and my reward will be a sore neck at the end if this viewing.

I like Daniel Craig,he is  probably the best actor that has ever played 007,he is cool without being too much of a cliché character,this bond can get hurt and in the first part of this adventure he ends up getting shot and presumed dead,part of me was aching for this to be the end of Bond,would have to be the bravest and boldest move by any director,Kill bond and let M fill in for him for the rest of the movie, this would have been nice but surprise surprise Bond washes up on a beach…

I was then distracted by my new neighbour / stranger who was sat to my left,she was sending a tweet on her phone,the light from her phone caught my attention,as I looked down at her phone she wrote Oh my god,Bond dies! I had no interest in her tweets but my blood was boiling as I felt her distraction was rude and unbelievably inconsiderate,a few minutes later the light from her phone lit up again,false alarm folks,bond lives! I carried on looking at her phone until she noticed me,she saw me looking and closed it down,I started to fantasize about grabbing her phone if she opened it again and flinging it in the direction of the screen (5 yards away)

Back to Bond… I will always go and see James Bond,but the reason I went in the past was for the outstanding action sequences,Brosnan was pretty good at this,he was a very slick and almost a super Bond,with regards to his stunts as they always looked impossible.

Daniel Craig brings realism to the role,as much as I appreciate this I did find myself switching off throughout,I don’t really care about the story,we all know Bond will prevail in the end so just show us some sexy girls,an original bad guy and some amazing stunts and gadgets.

Now back to the idiots in the cinema,near the end Bond goes to Scotland,a middle age couple start nattering, (Idiot 1 ) Oh look love,its Scotland (Idiot 2) Oh yes,I bet they drove on the A449 to get there (Idiot 1) No dear I think you will find it was the A447..( Idiot 2) Mmmm Yes hun you are right,it’s the A447…I turned round at this point and shoved my fist into their fat faces,blood poured from the hole my fist had just created, everybody started to applaud my actions as they had spoken throughout the movie,I stood up at this point and took a bow,then back to reality and I was fuming with polite english reserve,I am sat there raging with annoyance,Bond has taken a back step,the retards behind me are now the main feature for me,I dream of making a scene but I am scared of how far I might take it if I really lose my shit with them,part of me thinks about shhhing them,but that seems incredibly lady like when I consider doing it,I then consider just asking them to be quiet ? but surely they are aware of where they are,they can not be that retarded,or maybe they can,so I thought the best thing I could do was be very English and hold my tongue and bitch about it on a blog somewhere later…(Here we are)

I prefer my download movies to this public disturbance,the cinema is not an interactive game.




7 thoughts on “Skyfall (2012) Movie review – Idiots in the cinema ruined my viewing”

  1. I see one to three movies in the cinema each week. Its a shame these morons ruined it. I would have ratted on them to staff. Cell disturbance is strictly forbidden. I hate people talking loudly about films they saw in line up for tickets, food and after in washroom. I’ve heard plot and spoilers. Always steer the chat out of ear shot.

    Other thing that happens more often are tall people that show up at last minute and choose seat right in front of me or a shorter friend. Thanks Neanderthal for blocking our view. Any thoughts?

  2. I still enjoyed the film but I think some people dont understand that people go to the cinema to enjoy the escapism,each time they open their phone or decide to talk over the movie they bring you back to reality,I feel for the tall people,it’s not like they are choosing to be rude,maybe they should sit on the floor ?

  3. hahaa. great post. i laughed out loud. whenever that has happened to me in theaters i’ve been super passive-aggressive about the event after the film finished, i.e. walking out of the theater i’ll make some snide comments to my moviegoing buddy about how obnoxious those twats were during taht one scene. sometimes it caused a head to turn, most of the time i was unsuccessful at gaining my own attention. i feel your pain.

  4. Not sit on the floor but just uxse their eyes to see they are not blocking someones view. Lots of seats usually. I’m 5 foot 7.5, a friend is 5’4 so I’m averagish.

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