Iron Man 3: Movie Review – Old Iron Wanted for scrap!

The movie starts off well enough and there is plenty of action and special effects to keep the eyes busy, but this soon filters out when Iron Man starts having a breakdown. I’m not spoiling anything when I say Tony gets a visit from the bad guys of which he invited in the first place. They’re set on destroying his empire; caught unaware Tony needs a last grasp plan for a getaway. No one gets away with trying to destroy Iron Man without retribution, while out of harm’s way Tony seeks his revenge.

When he is away it’s where the movie takes a dip, when Stark is taken away from his gadget room, what has he got to rely on? Not a great deal, it seems he can’t even think for himself without Jarvis (he’s computer) and pepper , so when the chips are down he seeks help from a 12 year old boy! Iron Man doesn’t turn into a paedophile, although that would have made things interesting! No this 12 year old not even nerdy, so what’s he going bring to the table except for his supped up potato gun? Of course he brings more than that; he’s got a cute face and razor whit! What more do you need when saving mankind from The Mandarin.

The dialogue in this movie is the best thing going for it, without it the movie could have been a lot worse off. RDJ is the king of coolness; he could pull off just about anything. It seems they really wanted to pull laughs out regularly in the movie, that’s normally a bad sign though, because it means they are trying to distract you from areas of the movie that are worth forgetting. The one character in the movie that does upstage RDJ is Sir Ben Kingsley as The Mandarin, he is pure comedy gold. He shows what a talent he is and will always be. Guy Pearce has more of a roll than one would like, I’m not saying he’s bad; he’s just not very memorable. Gwyneth really gets to show us this time around why she’s hot property of late, in the abominable area anyway. She even gets to don one of the many Iron man suits which shouldn’t really work because their only supposed to be programmed for Tony?

This instalment is part 3 for a good reason, Iron Man 1 was fresh and fun, 2 just went off the rails a little and with 3 they seemed to try and re-direct it back on course, but only managing to keep it on the curve.

I don’t see where they go from here if Robert Downey Jr does jump ship! I’m not sure anyone else could carry Iron man like he did. You just know it’s not the end, it makes too much money to quit.

6/10

Yappy

Welcome to the punch(2013) Movie review: Really bad and really BORING!

This is the type of movie that bores me beyond belief,a story about a super thief who is being chased by a cop who is living and working with his own problems as well as a power struggle within the police that you know relates to an inside man within the opening scenes.

The directors attempt to create an edgy thriller turns into a bad episode of the bill (UK TV drama) the dialogue is painful and the characters and story are so generic that my only reaction with twenty minutes on the clock was to turn off!

I kept going but I was now a detached viewer,I found myself asking; how such a poor piece of movie making could make it to our screens,the cast is strong, Mark Strong in fact,but the production is so lame that even this marvelous actor matched with James McAvoy’s talent could not save the show.

The pace of the film and the characters just do not work,the films leaves you with a real zero feeling.

0/10

KO

The Evil Dead- 2013 Movie Review, The Evil is ruined

Somebody really needs to tie the Director down under torture circumstances and get the truth to what this movie was!  Was it a re-make, a re-boot, an upgrade, a waste of time? My guess it is was the latter. Again we’ve come to a place that didn’t need to be revisited in the first place. The original holds up pretty well all by its self. I’ve heard the Director say it’s a different story that entwined with the original with the idea of the two heroines coming together in the foreseeable future. That sounded like a great idea when the words came out his mouth. The only trouble being is the movie should not even be breathed in the same air as the original.

They try and fool you by giving the characters new dimensions this time around, the troubled teen needing divine intervention from her friends to kick a drug habit. Sound good in theory, but it seems she’s really not that fucked up, because when the shit goes down she seems more hyper than a five-year who drank 6 Red bulls, then again being raped by a tree sure might make the withdrawal process speed up. This movie just lost itself when the words were uttered about remaking it in the first place. Its treats the viewer with no respect at all, at the beginning they have to explain why the book comes to be what it is, with visuals that would barely raise an eyebrow on TV before the watershed. After they watched the opening scene the director decided it was pretty lame on the gore side, so he notched it up. They just did what all horror movie makers do today and just put on a gore porn-vest. The only time you really get scared through the whole movie is when all these 5 friends try and actually act. It comes to something when they’re all getting upstaged by a tree. I don’t want to spoil the end for anyone, but trust me when I say it’s one of the laziest endings I’ve witnessed.  It was like they were trying to pack forty minutes of story into ten, but by then I was happy for the slap dash, I could have probably trimmed another five off.

4/10

3 marks for that tree, best piece of acting this year by a piece of timber.

Yappy

The Last stand (2013) Movie review:Much better than I was expecting!

Well when you look at Arnie’s classic action films there is one theme running throughout,a muscular guy who looks like he could dropkick a building while munching on a cigar,when I heard Arnie was dusting off his leather jacket I thought it could be very embarrassing for him,this thought was only enhanced when I saw the trailer of him being quoted as saying he felt old!

Well I guess this film is proof that at 65 he still has what it takes to deliver in the action genre,some of his one liners from the past came off as cheesy rather than witty,nothing has changed in that respect but rather than feel embarrassed for the former Mr Olympia I found myself smiling as I would if my granddad tried to portray an image we both know he is passed,the difference now ?… there is a look of wisdom in Arnold’s eyes,he knows exactly what is left in the tank and he also knows it blows other action stars,(new and old) out of the water and into reality TV.

While that sparkle is still there,I am happy to keep watching.

7/10

KO

Chasing Mavericks (2012) Movie review:What should have been a cool film,turns into a Karate kid movie

I had no idea that this movie was a true story until the end credits rolled up, Jay Moriarity is played by Jonny Weston, both of these names are new to me but my early conclusion is that Jay was an inspiration to people inside and out of surfing and Jonny Weston can’t act!

At times Jonny Weston looks almost mentally challenged when trying show emotion in his face, happy or sad the boy just made me want to call his doctor and make sure that last test came back ALL clear.

The Director of the movie (Michael Apted)  deserves to be shot,the basis of this story is of a boy who suffers at the hands of his poor upbringing which is only matched by his mothers poor choice in step fathers,with all his trouble he manages to find joy in surfing and takes his skill level to the extreme,this director decides to take a cool story and turn it into the Karate kid,the dialogue is so cheesy at times it creates an urge to turn the movie off.

Gerard Butler plays Mr Miagee, his character makes little sense,he plays a veteran surfer with a wild streak who is super keen on discipline,health and safety…. and writing letters.

I hope someone remakes this movie in the future and produces a bit of justice to the man in question!

3/10

KO

The conversation (1974) Movie review: I enjoyed this more than the Godfather!

Francis ford Coppola will always been known for the Godfather,well I don’t really rate that film,I find myself falling asleep every time I attempt to watch it,having watched an interview recently on the Howard stern show I was amazed how proud he was of a movie I have never seen: The conversation.

You could see his eyes light up at the mention of this film,he also fought to make the film for a long time so I plugged in and expected lots of silent moments matched with moments of drama,I was wrong….

Gene Hackman play a man who spies on people,this mainly includes him recording ” conversations” but this story teases you with what you think is a simple plot but instead begins to build into something interesting.

Gene was to later play a role very similar in Will Smiths Enemy of the state,there is not a chance in hell that the director of that film wasn’t a fan of the conversation.

Also nice to see a very young Harrison Ford…

I recommend this film to the real film fans,it’s not a blockbuster but more of a film that if you give your complete time and attention you will be paid off with what is a unique film that I found enjoyable.

7/10

KO